Thursday, October 20, 2011
Ichabod and The Ghost
Firstly, Ichabod Crane would like to thank Miss Wadsworth for allowing him the use of her blog to champion a subject he has been passionate about for some time:
There Are No Such Thing As Ghosts!
The following interviews are all his thoughts and Miss Wadsworth would like to post them all with the declaimer: These interviews have no bearing on her own personal beliefs. Please hold none of Ichabod's nonsense against her.
Ichabod: Yes, well that was most unnecessary, Miss Wadsworth. Nonetheless, I am the schoolmaster in Tarrytown, New York and recently it has been brought to my attention that more than just my students are in want of a proper education. In my century there are many superstitious folks who tell tales of ghosts and goblins.
Today we have with us Remy Charles from Las Vegas whose story is being featured in a book entitled GHOST OF A CHANCE by Deena Remiel.
He'll be sitting in the recording studio for some reason...doubtless to substantiate his claims of being turned into a ghost of a man no doubt. Now, why don’t you tell us a bit about yourself?
Remy: Well, first Mr. Crane, thank you for the opportunity to lessen your skepticism as to the matter of ghosts. It may help a lot if we were actually in the same room for the interview. I understand, however, that for recording purposes, we have to sit in separate rooms. As for who I am, what I’m all about, it’s complicated. I was born and raised in Las Vegas. Parents didn’t have a pot to piss in, and it was a dreadful environment for me to grow up in. I dreamed of being so filthy rich that I’d never have to worry about when my next meal would be. I lived for school and education. It ultimately freed me from poverty.
Ichabod: I can relate to that, sir, being but a poor school teacher. Bet where does this ghost business come into your story?
Remy: I'm getting to that. I started my green company right out of college and married my college sweetheart. Here’s where it gets complicated, or messy at the very least. I was never home, always working, making a fortune, and becoming a building magnate in the process. The wife asked for a divorce, and besides taking a hefty chunk of my money, she laid a curse on me, the vengeful witch. I’ve been living my life ever since as a ghost.
Ichabod: So your ex-wife cursed you? And now you are a ghost? How so?
Remy: I can walk through walls, closed doors, any solid matter. That means I can’t touch anything or anyone. For a pretty good length of time, I can use my energy to create an outline of my form so I’m not completely invisible. But I do have to go invisible at regular intervals.
Ichabod: Naturally (((he scribbles in his notepad)))
Remy: It’s definitely changed my life, I can tell you that. Not for the better, either. I am so sick and tired of these jeans and t-shirt I’ve worn for the past 10 years! I miss the taste of food and a good beer. It’s put a real damper on all of my relationships, friends and lovers alike.
Ichabod: I suppose it would be difficult to take a lover if you have to be invisible. Do you have any proof of all this? Any other people that might vouch for your sanity?
Remy: Proof. You want proof. What more proof can I give other than being here? Why don’t you come into my recording room right now and see for yourself? Or are you afraid of letting go of your well-fortified false beliefs?
Ichabod: (((squirms in his seat))) I think I'll stay here where I am, thank you.
Remy: (((steals Ichabod's line)))Naturally. If you’re unwilling to believe your own eyes, I guess you could talk to Tracy, my ex-wife or Secoya, her voodoo-loving friend who put the Whammy on me.
Ichabod: I think I shall pass. I have spoken with people claiming to be witches, very confrontational creatures. Women and witches, actually. Now, an you tell me about this charlatan that has written your story?
Remy: Denial is a wonderful river isn’t it? All right, so you want to know a bit about Deena Remiel? I’ve got the biggest crush on her! Well, because for one, she believes I’m a ghost! Two, she’s written me a fabulously sexy woman, Susannah, and hot scenes that will surely have her smitten with me by the end of the book. This isn’t Deena’s first book, by the way. She’s been writing for a while now, ever since she became possessed by an invisible force and moved with her husband and two daughters from New Jersey to Arizona. In between blinking and teaching middle school kids how to write, she finds time to neglect the laundry, cleaning, and cooking in order to write more swoon-worthy books. If you want to talk with her yourself, make sure you have peanut M&M’s or Dove chocolate on hand. You’ll get a lot of info out of her that way. She’ll probably ask to take pictures and then scrapbook the whole event.
Ichabod: Well, she does sound like a lovely woman. Has she written anything else?
Remy: Another book she’s published with Decadent Publishing is a paranormal romance called TRINITY A BRETHREN NOVEL. RELIC, the second book in the series is coming soon. BRETHREN BEGINNINGS VOLUME 1, and PICTURE PERFECT are books she’s self-published. All are available wherever eBooks are sold.
Ichabod: Is there a way I can contact Deena so that I may speak with her personally about the nonsense they are perpetuating?
Remy: Let’s see if I can remember. Naturally, I can’t hold any paper nor write anything down. Oh yes, her website is www.deenaremiel.com. Her Brethren have a site of their own called, http://riseofthebrethren.wordpress.com. You can find her on FACEBOOK and Twitter. She also writes for a couple of blogs besides her own. She’s called Hot Lava Mama at PlotMamas. She writes Wednesday Witticisms every Wednesday at http://plotmamas.wordpress.com. Every 4th Thursday she writes about all things paranormal for the Para-Posse.
Ichabod: And where can my followers purchase this book if they wish for a good laugh? I’m, assuming it is in the fiction category (((snort, snort )))
Remy: Oh, oh, you’re hilarious, Crane, a regular riot. You can buy GHOST OF A CHANCE in a few places. First of all, you can buy right from Decadent Publishing
Or you can buy it from Amazon
It’s also available at AllRomanceEbooks and Smashwords
Ichabod: Thank you for stopping in, sir. You have been most helpful with my research.
As for the readers, if you would like to make a comment below, you can be entered to win this book GHOST OF A CHANCE and my own story THE LEGEND OF SLEEPY HOLLOW.
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